Culture = vulnerability + ???
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Last Friday, I flew to Florida to run a staff training for the Y of the Gulf Coast. Done enough of these to know: you can tell within the first hour what kind of summer this team is going to have.
The format was simple and very camp. Rock out the Church Clap and the Sticky Sticky Waffles song. Run a ton of games and go through what it means to be a great camp counselor.
Halfway through, the Y’s head of youth development pulled me aside. He said: “I can tell this is going to be a great group because when you put on music, 80% of them started dancing.”
He’s 100% right. If you can get 80% of a room of strangers to look a little silly in front of each other in the first hour, you don’t need to worry much about the summer.
The working definition
Vulnerability gets a bad rap sometimes. It’s not just crying and talking about all the feels. Really, it’s about doing something that could be judged and trusting that people won’t judge you.
What makes camp awesome is that when people are vulnerable in that way, when they decide to yell a little bit louder or get up on stage for the bit, the rest of the group is usually into it. There’s no putting anyone down.
Doesn’t mean you have to celebrate everything. Most of the time, the credit happens quietly in the background or through unspoken (but very much understood) social capital. Mostly, though, someone does something a little different, and the group just moves on with them. No big deal. The not-big-deal-ness is itself the point.
The formula in public
I want to be vulnerable for a second. Use some political examples. BTW, I hate what Trump is doing to our country, and clearly, his version of vulnerability brings his people in.
Trump does a weird dance at his rallies. Tells weird jokes. His crowd picks him up every time. On the other side, AOC takes real risks, does awesome, yap-style social media, talks about being a bartender, and opens herself up for criticism. People either love or hate both AOC and Trump, largely because they take risks around being judged.
Same formula. Completely different tribes.
Seth Godin calls it “people like us do things like this.” The group decides what’s inside the culture and what’s outside. You only get credit for doing stuff other people won’t.
When your group loves it, they pick you up.
That mechanism runs the same way everywhere. The tribe changes. The formula doesn’t. The only question is what you’re building it around.
Camp gets to choose
You get to decide what’s inside the culture and what’s outside.
A funny dance: inside. Being racist: obviously outside.
Unfortunately, often times at school, picking on someone is low-cost. At camp, when the culture is built right, picking on someone costs you social capital. Doing something a little different gains it.
You built that. The Overton window of acceptable behaviors at your camp is yours. Most places don’t get to set it. You do.
Culture = vulnerability + ???
Culture equals vulnerability plus…
And then I stop. I haven’t figured out the back half yet. Here are the five words I’m circling around:
Credit. You only get credit for doing stuff other people don’t do.
Belonging. You take the risk and land inside the group.
Trust. The implicit promise that the group won’t punish you for going first.
Intention. This culture doesn’t happen by accident. You build it on purpose.
Reception. What the group does when you’re vulnerable is the other half of the equation.
I don’t know which one completes it. Maybe it’s all of them. Maybe it’s something else entirely.
But for sure there’s a connection here. And think I’m betting on trying to figure it out. Because it would go a long way in explaining what the Y Director knew from the top.
Getting 80% of a room of strangers to look a little silly in front of each other in the first hour, and you don’t need to worry much about the summer.
You got this,
Jack
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Get my newsletter every week.
It’s all about kids today
Jack Schott
Summer Camp Evangelist