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It’s all about kids today
Remember last week when I said I was obsessed with Lynn Lyons? Well, the obsession continues.
Recently had the chance to interview Lynn for my podcast (you can watch the full episode here), and the conversation was a training ground in rethinking everything I thought I knew about anxiety.
For the not-obsessed crowd, Lynn is a psychotherapist who’s spent three-plus decades in the kid and family trenches, helping to navigate anxiety.
And here’s the thing she made crystal clear: The way we’re handling anxiety in today’s world isn’t only ineffective – it’s even making things way worse.
What Anxiety Actually Is
Let’s start with a definition that blew my mind.
According to Lynn, Anxiety is the overestimation of a problem and the underestimation of our resources to handle it.
That’s it. That’s the whole freaking thing.
When a kid (or an adult) is anxious, they’re making two fundamental errors:
Amplifying the problem way beyond what it is
Forgetting they have the ability to handle it
Now, contrast this with actual, honest to goodness danger. If your camp is literally on fire (like real flames), that’s not anxiety – that’s fear of everything burning the hell down. You aren’t like, “Umm, I’m feeling pretty anxious about this fire raging all around me.”
The problem isn’t overestimated; it’s real.
But most of what we call “anxiety” is our brain promoting non-emergencies to 911 status, while at the same time, cutting us off from our problem-solving abilities.
How We Got This So Wrong
Here’s where things get tricky.
We’ve started letting kids identify as “anxious people.” As if anxiety is something they are instead of something they experience.
Lynn put it perfectly: “Anxiety lives outside of us. One of the problems is that people identify as anxious people. So they bring it into them, and it becomes who they are.”
You might be thinking, “Jack, I am an anxious person,” and I totally get it. What Lynn says is we (and kids too) might be internalizing something that should be external. Anxiety is something we can manage. It’s not something to be.
Camp: The Anxiety-Fighting Machine We (Maybe, Kinda) Built
So what does all this have to do with camp?
Everything.
Think about what happens at camp:
Kids come up against problems. Real problems, not manufactured ones.
Maybe they’re homesick.
Maybe they’ve never paddled a canoe before.
Maybe they got put in a cabin with a kid they don’t click with.
Maybe they’ve figured out they’re terrified of heights halfway up the climbing wall.
Maybe they’re performing in the camp talent show when they’ve never been on stage.
And then… they figure it out. They manage. They get through.
Each time this happens, they’re building the exact muscle to fight anxiety. They’re learning to accurately assess problems (is this really an emergency?) and they’re proving to themselves they have resources to handle challenges.
The Problem-Solving Muscle
One of the most powerful things we can do for anxious kids is to help them build a catalog of moments where and when they faced uncertainty and then figured it out.
Think of camp as one giant, 24/7 uncertainty catalog builder.
Every time a camper tries something new, navigates a social situation, or handles a disappointment, they’re adding to their mental file cabinet labeled “I can handle uncertain things.”
And I’m going to repeat it, because I think it’s so incredibly important for kids to know this about themselves.
“I can handle uncertain things.”
And unlike school or home, where grown-ups can (and often should) swoop in at any moment, camp creates a container where kids get to (have to) practice these skills constantly.
The Most Powerful Question
Here’s a game-changer I’m keeping in my back pocket all summer long and making it a part of the staff training toolkit:
“What was something unexpected that happened today, and how did you manage it?”
Not just “What was your favorite part of the day?”
Not just “Did you have fun?”
But specifically asking about the unexpected – because that’s where growth happens.
This simple question does two powerful things:
It normalizes that unexpected things happen (they always will)
It focuses on the child’s ability to handle it (they can)
It outlines the anxiety-creating moments, and then shows them a huge personal W in their ability to level up their anxiety-handling-mojo.
For Camp Professionals: Start Talking About It
One of the most valuable things we can do, as professionals, is start explicitly framing camp as an anxiety-fighting training ground.
Treat anxiety fighting as a mental and emotional combat sport. (The fun kind, duh).
When parents ask me what makes camp special, I’m not just talking about the activities. I’m talking all about the skills kids build by navigating uncertainty in a supportive environment.
When we’re training staff, it’s going to be all about them noticing and naming moments when kids push through challenges. Stuff like, “You just figured out how to solve that problem on your own. That’s going to help you in so many situations.”
When I’m marketing camp, it won’t be just selling the fun (though the fun matters!). It’s selling the growth that comes from facing the unexpected and figuring it out.
The fun, the activities, the cool stuff, it’s all the delivery system for the growth in conquering anxiety.
A Different Kind of Safe Space
Parents today are (understandably) obsessed with keeping their kids safe.
But real safety isn’t about removing all challenges or protecting kids from every discomfort. It’s about building kids who can navigate an uncertain world with confidence.
Camp is a safe space not because nothing hard happens here, but because hard things happen in an environment where kids can practice working through them.
In a world that keeps trying to bubble-wrap childhood, camp might be exactly the medicine we need.
Less protection, more preparation.
Less “Let me fix that,” and more “I bet you can figure this out.”
Less anxiety, more of everything else.
You got this
Jack
Get my newsletter every week.
It’s all about kids today
Jack Schott
Summer Camp Evangelist